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Struggling with physical and mental health issues in 1L, don't see way out of this. Need advice


Struggling

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Struggling
  • Law Student

Hey, I'm a 1L student and I stopped going to any of my courses after December due to physical health issues I've developed in between my undergrad and being accepted into law school. Basically, I've acquired a neurological condition that makes it incredibly difficult to move my head around, or to adjust to bright and complex patterns of light without becoming disoriented and confused, among a host of other motor coordination problems. The meds I am on totally fuck with my focus and motivation, as the only way to help my condition seems to be forcing my brain to not focus on it using various anti-anxiety meds that totally numb my mind.   

 

I would have never considered this could be a situation I'd end up in, but here I am. It's so difficult for me, I am truly barely hanging in here. I have completed one semester if that makes any difference, but in terms of my finals no matter how many deferrals and accommodations I am given , I don't think I'll be able to do it. 

The Deans have also been incredibly hostile towards me in my attempts to seek accommodations and mentioned multiple times that they feel I am placing the faculty under "undue hardship" via my repeated requests for deferrals. The amount of pain and effort I need to exert study for and write even a single exam is leaving me physically and mentally totally spent, and they are insistent I write them as quickly as possible with no rest time in between my exams. But really, even with all the time in the world I'm really not sure I can do it. 

Perhaps more importantly than all my physical and mental health issues, I feel supremely unwelcome at the law school. My reclusion from social life has left me with really no friends to rely on in my classes, and my communications with the faculty range from condescending to outright hostile regarding my requests for accommodation. I truly do not want to be here anymore in any way.

What can I do? I am struggling to see a path forward in law at this point, particularly at my school. I have considered simply starting all over, leaving and returning to a different school when I have these problems more under control, but seeing the increasing level of competition for spots in any program has me horrified. I dont have any faith that I'd be able to even earn a spot in my program a year or two from now given where my admissions statistics are. A transfer to a school closer to me could be a viable option, but I can't transfer with a single semester of in progress grades. 

 

I feel trapped, has anyone been in an even remotely similar scenario? Whether that be transferring from a school you felt was a negative environment for yourself, arranging accommodations for complex health issues, or just leaving school entirely and coming back when you were better. I feel like my situation is so dire and unusual that I have no one to turn to for advice. 

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LMP
  • Law Student

First off, I want to say that I'm very sorry you have to go through this. You've been faced with a lot of challenges and the people who were supposed to support you seem to have failed to do so. Looking after yourself should always come first, your physical and mental health are always paramount. Taking the steps you need to protect your well-being is never a bad move. 

As for your trouble with school and the administration, this is obviously a more complex matter. Personally, I think it is very important to clearly identify how the administration is handling your situation. If you aim to transfer or to re-enter law school later on then the marks you get now will be very important. And though you and I would know that your marks aren't reflective of your performance, that isn't a battle you want to be fighting. 

So what can you do? There are many organizations that can provide you free legal advice or support for people with disabilities. I would really reccomend getting in touch with one. In part to ensure the administration is meeting it's requirements. But also because even if you don't want to stay where you are, fighting for yourself now will keep those doors to transfer or re-enter open.

 

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Struggling
  • Law Student

Thank you for the advice LMP. It's been very tough to say that my current performance is not indicative of my current ability given how significantly my illness has impacted my academic abilities, but I hope the old me is in here somewhere. I was admitted under the same basis as every other student, that's what I keep telling myself. Inside of me is still the student that worked and strove to make it here, I just need to find them again. The only question in my mind is whether my faculty is willing to give me the time I need to take that journey with doctors and other medical professionals.

 

The messages I've received from even my own assistant Dean beggar belief, and indicate a strongly held negative perception about my circumstances that seems to go right to the top. 

 

I had considered seeking out legal advice, but I've been warned off by the few acquaintances I do have in the law student community, highly cautioning me against "lawyering up" against the very gatekeepers to the profession. It is a sound type of reasoning, but I do need to do something to assert my rights as a student if the faculty will continue to dismiss the validity of my struggles. 

 

Thank you for taking me seriously, I feel its something that's made this time for me so much harder. 

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FlyingFish
  • Articling Student

Have you contacted your students’ union or considered reaching out to your school’s ombudsman? Both might be good steps to take before contemplating getting lawyers involved. 

Notwithstanding the above, it might be a good idea to talk to a lawyer and get an idea of legal options and alternatives. You can get some advice and maybe hold off on the litigation. If money is an issue, there are usually free legal advice clinics in most major cities. Edmonton for example has the Edmonton Community Legal Centre and Student Legal Services. 

 

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Archaeolaw
  • Law Student

Hey, I just finished up 1L. Really sorry to hear about your situation. 
The Dean's use of the words "undue hardship" really sticks out to me, and I think it indicates their position pretty clearly. I'm not sure if you're in Ontario, but that language is directly from the ON Human Rights Code (it might also exist in other provincial legislation, idk). I'm a 1L like I mentioned, so I won't try to provide some kind of legal advice-ish analysis. But the way I understand it is that employers/educators have to accommodate to the point of "undue hardship", as defined in some case law. 
Anyway my point is that it sounds like the Dean is using that language because they're not very interested in accommodating you further. I really don't think that use of language is coincidental. Like others have said, I would seek out some kind of legal advice. 
Best of luck. 

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burnedout
  • Law Student

Hey. First off, I'm very sorry you're going through this. 

I went through a similar situation in my 1L, ended the year with pretty dismal grades, but was luckily supported by a great administration who helped me transfer to a law school near my support system. I've just finished my 3L, and it wasn't easy by any means, but I did get through it. I also required a lot of extensions, exam deferrals, etc throughout. The school I transferred into was not as supportive, but still made sure I had what I needed to get by. 

I would look into a transfer if that's something possible for you. I would also echo what the above comments have said about reaching out to some sort of legal support. 

I know that at my law school, it's possible to do the program part time. Is this something you would consider? It may take you longer to complete your degree but will take a bit of the load off. My school also offered summer courses so that you could lighten your load during the year. 

Also, if you need financial support the provinces/federal government through the student loan program have really great disability grant programs. I was able to get a pretty decent tuition grant along with a technology grant for a computer etc. You can also use it to purchase equipment you might need, like special chairs. 

Again, I'm very sorry. Feel free to send me a message and I can try my best to provide a bit more advice privately. 

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Case
  • Lawyer

If you are "at a loss" and feel like you need legal support, do not hesitate to call a legal clinic. Most provinces will have specialist legal clinics for disability issues or Human Rights issues. If you are in Ontario I would suggest calling ARCH in Toronto. 

You would do this if you feel like the administration should accommodate you further and they are refusing. That is squarely a disability law / human rights law matter. Some advocacy could go a long way. 

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I've gone through something similar.  If you are capable of passing exams and doing assignments (albeit with deferrals) despite your problems then you are in a better spot than I was.   I personally left law school and came back when I was better.   I understand where you are coming from as far as the hostility you have experienced, it is baffling to me why law school is often not a collegial environment and why admin in incompetent.  You shouldn't deal with the law faculty on your own, you should see if the university can provide you with someone who can advocate on your behalf.  When it comes to accommodation appeals, the final internal appeal will probably be to the University Senate not the Dean of the faculty, so don't be discouraged.  

 

 

Edited by myth000
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